Love sucks but sorta doesn't....

Oh good lord what did I almost do lol
When you feel a bit down your brain goes to mush and you start thinking that contacting your ex is such a good idea! Luckily I managed to refrain from doing so, I think I must be hormonal (being a woman I can say that, fellas arnt aloud for pain of their head being removed from their shoulders by the PMT monster :P)
I guess it's because the nights are drawing in, getting colder and I just want to curl up on the sofa with some strong arms round me, feeling the heat of a male body and have the occasional kiss. Not much to ask really is it.
It's a love/hate time of year, its a bit pants really. Christmas is coming up oh and new years.... can I be Sally and find myself my very own Harry?? Ill even fake a couple of orgasms in a diner if that would help my plight? Having someone fight their way across town just to be with me at midnight for one wonderful kiss really appeals somehow.. hmm well the offers there.....
Last night though I felt more like Brigit Jones in the scene where she is belting out 'All by myself' with every drop of heart breaking emotion (and rather allot of wine) she has into her hairbrush looking oh so ermm fab in her vest and knickers....... except I wasn't in my vest and knickers, didn't have a hairbrush, I wasn't singing nor was I the slightest bit drunk :P.
I don't have a Mr Darcy to pine over: the sort of fella who would put up with your odd relatives just to be with you, I have a 'Mr I couldn't possibly tell the truth until it is far too late for that to make any difference and it gets me dumped...' sort of fella. But hell I still like him, I was falling for him and I still could which is why contacting him wouldn't be a good idea, he could talk his way out of a snake pit with no ill effect but I'd somehow manage to get bitten.
He had a way with me like no one else ever has and telling him no again would be too hard. So there I was sat with the cursor above 'compose new message' thinking should I? really should I? but came to the conclusion that I shouldn't even type it without the intention of sending to work it out of my system, so I clicked off that looking for something else to occupy myself with and it was then that I hear Taylor Swift pipe up on the telly 'marry me Juliet you never have to be alone....' came her perfect tones. Ppphhhfffft now I feel down again and want a hug.... :P
Love sucks but at the same time sorta doesn't..... then again its valentines day soon after all this: ok maybe it just sucks. Ill get back to you.